Sometimes, you get this inner instinct, this feeling that makes you feel like… it’s just right. it simply fits. its like, your whole existence simply makes sense, and you feel like you are in the center of the world, and you see and feel purpose. and fulfilment.
i am someone who always knew what i wanted in life. unlike many children or at least, unlike many of my peers and even my sister, i never had wandering ambitions. i never jumped from dream to dream, thinking that i would be a doctor one day, and an astronaut the next. from the age of 7, i always knew what i wanted to be. and i am fully aware, that i am blessed in that sense. and as a friend once pointed out, i am also blessed, because i have been able to chase that dream, and do what i wanted.
what amazes me, especially as another year is rapidly coming to an end, is how dreams sometimes take unexpected turns. sometimes a dream gets smaller, like a balloon deflating. or sometimes, dreams get inflated, they somehow become a longer journey to a rainbow that is higher up in the sky. for me, i do not know how, my dream, got so big. sometimes i feel like it got bigger than me, it is far too huge for me to keep a hold on. this balloon is far too slippery for me to have a firm grip. and i keep falling down in my attempts to hold on to my inflated dream.
but there are, some moments, where… despite everything, despite all the pain and failed attempts to hold on… that you know, deep down, that this is meant to be. it simply, feels right.
another melancholic post. (i promise i will return to more positive posts about fashion soon!)
